- cup your hands around them protectively
- lift them from the ground
- gently kiss their fuzzy heads
- say “peep peep” calmingly so as not to be pecked
- peep peep
every year after you turn 17 you get further away from being the age of the dancing queen and that’s my least favorite thing about growing up
ah but when you turn 34 you’re two dancing queens and thus having twice the time of your life. and at 51 you become the dancing triumvirate and three golden crowns are forged in your honor
lots to look forward to
life hack: get a tattoo. if the people at the job interview notice it and look concerned, laugh a little and explain “it’s just temporary.” months later if your boss asks why you lied and said it was a temporary tattoo, stare off into the distance and whisper with a tremulous voice the poor excuse for truth your subconscious has been fighting for its entire insignificant existence: “everything is temporary.”
some great quote I heard somewhere once upon a time and that is very, very true (via regardingsarah)
Im pretty sure mrs. walker from holes proved with her rattle snake venom infused nail polish that y’all are even more deadly when your nails are drying(via swolizard)
|why do black people use you in the wrong context? such is "you ugly" instead of "you're ugly" I know u guys can differentiate, it's a nuisance|
you a bitch
It’s called copula deletion, or zero copula. Many languages and dialects, including Ancient Greek and Russian, delete the copula (the verb to be) when the context is obvious.
So an utterance like “you a bitch” in AAVE is not an example of a misused you, but an example of a sentence that deletes the copular verb (are), which is a perfectly valid thing to do in that dialect, just as deleting an /r/ after a vowel is a perfectly valid thing to do in an upper-class British dialect.
Kindergarten: Stupid. Oh gosh don’t tell anyone I said that.
Elementary school: What the heck.
Middle School: Damn it this is freaking dumb as hell
High school: what the fuck did you just say you little fucking shitbitchcuntfuck I will beat the dicks out of your ass
College: what the frick frack snick snack are u doing